The truth about the cry-it-out method and sleep training

If you’re a parent that has explored the idea of sleep training, you have likely heard of the cry-it-out (CIO) method, where you allow your baby to cry him/herself to sleep in hopes that the child will learn to sleep independently. It is no secret that this method has become highly controversial, but somewhere along the way it also became associated with the term "sleep training” itself.

There are also variations of the CIO method, such as timed or controlled crying with check ins at  5, 10, 20 minutes, with the most well-known version of this developed by pediatrician Richard Ferber. His method is often referred to as "Ferberizing," where parents allow their child to cry and learn to self-soothe for a predetermined amount of time before the parents come in to help.

While some parents do use these methods during the sleep training process, the truth is,  sleep training is not directly linked to the cry-it-out method, Ferberizing, or any specific method for that matter. Sleep training is simply helping to teach your child to sleep independently and to develop healthy sleep habits that stick long term. 

Sleep training can usually start when a baby is around four months old and is on track developmentally and absent of any medical concerns. By four months, babies have developed a regular sleep-wake cycle, circadian rhythm, and are capable of going through the night without a feeding (although many babies still take a feed overnight throughout the first year).  

When researching sleep training, there are all sorts of articles you may find that label any method associated with crying as "harsh” and “damaging” to the child, deterring parents from attempting to sleep train their child at all. 

Some of these ideas come from past studies that have researched extreme forms of crying and separation, such as those observed in the 1980s in a Romanian orphanage.   

The challenge with many of these studies is that there are many additional factors not taken into consideration that can contribute to the impact crying has on a child, such as continued neglect, abandonment, or a stressful home environment. In any of these situations, short-term or long-term crying could contribute greatly to existing stress of the child, whereas short periods of crying in a physically and emotionally healthy child have a much different effect.

A study was done in Australia with 328 mothers of 7-month-old babies that were all having trouble sleeping. About half of these moms were assigned to the cry-it-out sleep method to sleep train, and half were not.

The results showed that those who sleep trained using the CIO method got better sleep and the parents were in better moods.

They followed up with these same children one year later and again five years later. During that last study, when the children were six years old, the results showed that the children who were sleep trained had no significant differences with the children who were not sleep trained in terms of emotional stability, behavior, stress, or parent-child bonds, showing that sleep training using this method did not have long-term negative effects.

Other studies that have been done confirm these findings and some have even shown improvements in maternal depression when babies were sleep trained. As most people have experienced, sleep affects mood, and parents and babies who get more sleep are generally in better moods!

Even with these findings, hearing your baby cry is definitely hard for any parent, and it's understandable why many are simply unwilling to attempt the cry-it-out method (and to be clear, prior to four months we do not recommend taking this approach, as your baby simply isn’t ready developmentally).

If you are starting to think about sleep training with your little but you are concerned about tears, the good news is there are many other methods that don’t involve long periods of crying and are very effective in helping your baby sleep well. In fact, in many situations, addressing the foundations of sleep (nutrition, sleep environment, routine, and sleep schedules) are all that is needed to improve sleep.  

Whichever direction you decide to take, we recommend doing as much research as possible from reputable sources, or reach out to us to discuss your options. And if hearing your baby cry makes you want to cry, taking a gradual and gentle approach is perfectly fine! 

The important thing is to be consistent about whatever you end up choosing. Consistency can be tough, especially when it is the middle of the night and you're just exhausted - we get it! Just remember the end goal and that any progress is progress and new habits take time to form. 

Regardless of the method you choose, you should not feel uncomfortable or shameful about that decision.  You may feel judged for either being too attached or for being too harsh, but the most important thing is for you to choose a sleep training method that you truly believe is right for you and for your baby, despite what others may think. 

For more sleep guidance, feel free to contact us or try our newborn sleep course , 4-12 month sleep course, or guide to sleeping through the night.

Related:
Is Sleep Training Really Necessary?
How to Respond to Your Crying Baby
How to Get Your Baby to Go to Sleep & Stay Asleep

Sources:
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/19/opinion/sunday/baby-breastfeeding-sleep-training.html
https://www.babycenter.com/0_baby-sleep-training-the-basics_1505715.bc
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/6-harsh-truths-baby-sleep-205517539.html
https://www.fatherly.com/parenting/what-type-of-sleep-training-is-right-for-me/