Thirteen positive affirmations for tired moms
Being a mom is a tough job and tiring job!
Throughout the day we juggle a variety of roles— from child psychologist, to event planner, master chef, to working outside of the home.
Wearing all these hats can leave moms feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and like they just can’t keep up. No wonder the feeling of not doing enough, or “mom guilt” often sets in, even when it isn’t warranted.
Even as I write this while my five month old naps, I can’t help but think about how I could be using this time to also throw in another load of laundry and finish a few extra dishes lying around. This feeling of “not doing enough” sits with me, despite having a pretty easy going son, and supportive husband. And I know I am not alone in these feelings! Feeling this way also makes me wonder about the level of survival mode taking over the many mothers currently managing zoom schooling during the pandemic and moms who are parenting multiple children at home.
Regardless of what motherhood looks like for you right now, I can bet you’ve also been nagged by the tiring list of “shoulds'' bouncing around in your mind as you go about your day. While it might be tough to pinpoint exactly where these internal pressures are coming from, you can still try to challenge them!
One way to do this is by using a positive affirmation. You might be thinking, “do these really work?” Or… “what I really need is clone, not an affirmation!”.
But in fact, using affirmations, or phrases/ words you repeat to yourself, is a form of mindfulness meditation. And the benefits of regularly incorporating the use of affirmations include developing a greater sense of calm, reduced stress and increased self-compassion, and something ALL moms could use— less sense of fatigue.
As a team we came up with thirteen affirmations for motherhood to inspire tired moms and highlight one simple truth: you are enough and are doing a great job, mom!
Affirmation for motherhood #1
“Some days we thrive and some days we simply survive.”
Some days, or even periods of time are going to feel like this. Things might feel impossible, and chaotic some days, and this affirmation can be helpful in remembering that this chaotic time is temporary. Also, avoid trying to be perfect during these stressful periods. If that means your toddler had more screen time than you’d like because you needed to tend to an inconsolable newborn, because that is what worked, that is okay!
Affirmation for motherhood #2
“They won’t be this little forever.”
Whether you are tackling bedtime battles, struggling with early morning wake ups, or trying to keep your cool after your toddler dumped their dinner on the floor, there is no doubt that certain days can feel endless. It can be hard to cherish the sweet moments when it’s been a long day, especially when it feels like our needs have been forgotten.
This affirmation may act as a helpful reminder to pause occasionally and notice a moment you might want to remember down the road. Maybe it allows you to breathe in an extra whiff of your baby’s sweet smelling head during an early morning feed, or capture a photo of your child in the bath as you wash off their mess. This way you can dwell on the positive moment, rather than the fact that they threw your nicely prepared dinner on the floor!
Affirmation for motherhood #3
“Good moms can have bad days.”
Even though moms truly are superheroes, it is important to also remember we are human, too! As a mom, you don’t get days off, and the days aren’t always fun. Just know these bad days or moments will pass, and since these days are inevitably going to happen, try to have a few things in mind that help you get through them, rather than focusing on feeling guilty about having a bad day.
Affirmation for motherhood #4
“My child’s behavior is not a direct representation of my parenting.”
Children are going to behave in unfavorable ways at times, and unfortunately the misbehavior might happen out in the grocery store or some other public outing that might make us feel judged or embarrassed.
Whether they are testing limits, experimenting with newfound vocabulary, or having big emotions for whatever the reason may be, dealing with unwanted behavior is part of the reality of being a mom! Moms are not expected to have perfectly behaved children, rather our job is to guide them and be present through their challenging moments.
Affirmation for motherhood #5
“This situation is a disaster. I am not a disaster.”
Similar to number four, this affirmation is another great one to keep in mind when situations feel out of control. I remember one night my husband came home from work when my then four month old would have been usually asleep, and dinner would have been ready. Instead, the house was a mess, dinner was half prepped, the cat had stolen a piece of raw chicken I was about to prep which ended up in the middle of the kitchen floor, and I was sweatily attempting to soothe my baby back to sleep, after accidentally missing his awake window before bed.
That moment felt like a disaster, and I felt like a mess. This affirmation definitely applies to situations like these. (We ended up eating dinner a little late and it was fine!).
Affirmation for motherhood #6
“I am a good mom having a hard time.”
While there are many moments of joy involved in motherhood, it is also not uncommon to feel overwhelmed with anxiety, frustration or even depression. The physical exhaustion, hormonal changes, and changes in relationship dynamics all play a role in how hard motherhood can feel. Remembering that these feelings can be normal and do not imply you are a bad mom can make all the difference! Of course if you are finding it too difficult to cope on your own, seek out support from family, friends or a professional.
Affirmation for motherhood #8
“My worth is not dependent on others' approval.”
Sometimes a small parenting related comment from a well-intentioned relative or friend can feel like a punch to the gut, and make you feel like you are not doing something right. Feeding, and sleep practices tend to be hot topics that moms receive a lot of different opinions about, and leave you wondering why someone couldn’t be a bit more gracious with their phrasing.
As a mom, it is your job to honor your own values, rather than than trying to meet other people’s approval. And if something someone said is really bothering you, share it with someone you trust so it doesn’t fester and keep you up all night. As the saying goes “what other people think is none of my business.”
Affirmation for motherhood #9
“I give myself permission to prioritize my child’s emotional well-being over her reading level, math grade or attention span.”
This affirmation truly speaks to our current situation. It is more than okay to spend as much time as needed to support children in processing their feelings surrounding the current pandemic.
Affirmation for motherhood #10
“I am doing enough. I am enough.”
Similar to number nine, this one is an excellent reminder for moms who may be feeling self- doubt about maintaining a sense of calm for their families.
Affirmation for motherhood #11
“I am allowed to take time for myself.”
Self-care is parenting too and one of the best things you can do as a mom for your family. Even though you may feel a sense of guilt when you take time for self-care, try not to listen to that feeling too much because taking time for a break can be really helpful in giving you the energy boost you need so you can go back to taking care of others.
Affirmation for motherhood #12
“My kids don’t need a perfect mom, they just need a present one.”
I love this one and could really use it myself for those moments I catch my mind wandering, worrying about the things that need to be done next. While it can be normal to think about the daily schedule, focusing too much on other situations that need tending to can just make you feel more worried, which leads to feeling tired or fatigued.
It might take some practice, but try to pay attention to times when you are in the moment, rather than rushing through things. A great time to practice being present is during your child’s bedtime routine. This tends to be a special time for children to connect with their parents after a busy day, so try not to rush and be present for the process. For me, before I place my son down into his crib for the night, I find it helpful to try to match his breathing in order to stay present for a few moments rather than thinking about how quickly I can put him down to go do the next thing. I do this because I know these moments fly by and I don’t want to miss them over a dirty dish!
Affirmations for motherhood #13
“I can do anything, but not everything. “
Our culture puts so much pressure on productivity, but trying to do too many things at once can leave moms feeling stretched too thin and burnt out.
So, rather than trying to do it all, try to prioritize what is most important to you at that moment, and allow the other things to wait.
This might mean some days you choose to spend more time engaging in play time, but have less time to dedicate to an elaborate dinner, so you order take out instead. Or maybe you seek out support if you find you are struggling with sleep deprivation, a very common challenge among new mothers.
Whether you decide to use one of our affirmations, or come up with your own, the phrase you use does not matter, as long as it is meaningful to you and can help you focus on a more positive perspective. Motherhood is a difficult, messy, tiring, and beautiful experience all rolled into one!
And even though it is nearly impossible to enjoy every minute, using positive affirmations regularly can help you enjoy your motherhood journey a bit better as a whole.
Sources:
What’s the Difference Between Postpartum Anxiety and Postpartum Depression?
Parenting in a Pandemic: Tips to Keep the Calm at Home
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